Welcome to the Cult, Chosen Ones - Post TGME

Before reading into this, please watch this first. Robin Williams wants to tell you something.

To put it as mildly as possible, the gist of his talk revolves around how you can't boast about certain things in life unless you have experienced them, you have lived those very moments and breathed in them. It is a speech that helps in preceding practicalities of life to its theories, assists in identifying walkers from the talkers and supports in the culmination of separating  men from the boys. It gives pointers to the two ends of life spectrum, the best moments and the worst. It tells you about how you can fall in and fall out of love with life. And many other things associated with it.

30th March 2011 was one such event in the aftermath of which Robin Williams's words to Pakistani cricket fans, especially the ones who had their hearts ripped apart due to their first major cricket heartache, would have connected. But possibly, the occasion was meant for a selective few, the already blessed ones - the ones who relived the pain of years and decades through this new generation of victims, the ones who would guide the new flock of loyalists to the world where they belong to and try to force the glory cashiers to get off the bandwagon.

And in the words of Frank Slade, "When the shit hits the fan, some guys run and some guys stay."

That exactly was the shit which broke loose on 30th March 2011, and the kind which provided a test.

Absorb this scene. It will either make or break you for your remaining lives.

It's been a good few days since TGME happened. I guess by this time most of the Pakistanis are done with at least 3 of the 5 stages of grief. Denial, anger and bargaining seem to be dealt with by the majority who was nuts about this match and was taken in by it's well-deserved hype. For all 5 phases to sink in together, let me be honest, was not and is no easy deal. Even for the die-hards and the serial masochists of Pakistan cricket, it hasn't been smooth going.

Let's face it, it's been a tough ride. A post-traumatic phase, which you would have dreaded after a humongous build up and a match of such magnitude, did transpire. To understate anything else would be insulting to those who have been shell-shocked, wept relentlessly, gone into week long depression, broken mobile phones, TV sets, overdid on their venting out mechanisms and everything that has to do with getting rid of the misery suffered at Mohali. And then to add to all of this, India took the trophy couple of days later. Bam!

But then, this agonizing journey means only for those who can absorb it all and will cross over to the other side of the fence. The end which makes a life of a Pakistani cricket fanatic - the holy cult.

As far as India is concerned, one would believe we have had it all. We have seen the self-inflicted mindfuck at Bangalore '96 happen, lived through the horror of Manchester '99 and survived the colossal torment at Centurion '03 (which for me personally, is right up there with the severest cricket heartbreaks).

But hey, it has not always been about India in World Cups. If it had been the case, it would be a crass evaluation of the traits of a Pakistan cricket nut.

Adversity teaches..

There have been many days when life has seemingly ceased to exist for the current crop. We have watched our greats implode at Faisalabad '97, the lifetime heart-breaker of  Lord's '99, the Aussie bigotry of Hobart '99, the injustice at Antigua '00, the finishing failure at Colombo '02, the Irish shocker of Kingston '07, the untimely choke at Galle '09 and few other major dents in between these two years.

Let's not dig deep into the past, maybe you would have lived through the agony of Sydney '10 or even the daylight robbery at St. Lucia '10. If you have, and you know what this bond is all about, the cost and hurt it comes with, the sardonic opposition you have to face, then you are definitely one of us.

Moreover, amidst all these unforgettable on-field clusterfuck of tragedies, we have lived through cricket's unfathomable episodes and events. The major part of our 90s was plagued with players factions and groupings, match fixing scandals, all of which was never rooted out and hence 2000s were inbred with them. We had players cheat, banned, fined and disgracefully retired; continual changes in administration giving our cricket the image of a neglected orphanage; coaches ending their tenures even before their first payslips were handed and have had one foreign coach (who had more Pakistaniat than many of us) die; politicians, ex-army generals interfere with the sports and leaving it paralyzed, terrorists attack on a visiting team thus ending any international cricket prospects in the country. And to the dismay of all of it, most of these things still haunt with their presence and their activities.

Food for your souls, dear believers

These are not your average causes of psychotherapeutic disorders. These are the ingredients for resistance and the bits that make you.

Ours is no Liverpool or Arsenal Football Club where if you don't win silverwares, you can fall back on history and say, hey we can bitch about you on basis of our past glories. Yes we do have a glorious past, have won almost everything in the game and have had almost every record accomplished, yet ours is not the way to fall back on yesteryear splendors. Among all the madness and sadness, we have learnt to live in the moment and that is where we get our strength from and one of the modes of how we feed our demented souls.

Life beckons, bleed green

This is a mosh-pit where believers learn to cope with sadism after being put through incessant tests of callous and maddeningly inconsistent on-field acts.

This is a congregation of habitual masochists who have taken the brunt of backing the only assembled lunatics of this game and never to subside easily.

This is a deranged mob of omnipotent vertebrates who have seen miracles transpire on a cricket field and have manifested in bleeding green only.

And once you have become the part of this cult..

You will come out of heartbreaks stronger, knowing that amidst all the perennial joys that Pakistan cricket provides you'll be able to live through the rugged of moments. You will know that you are a class apart from the glory hunters, fair weather folks, World Cup specialists and cricket cocktails who rode with you at some point of your evolution. You will realize that there is an unnerving self belief in you that is instilled only because you worship this cricket team and it will replicate in many things in life that you do.

Once there, times will come when you will feel being amputated, psyched out, mentally incapacitated and still being able to physically function. There will be stages when you will be staring in the mirror for hours and still be able to laugh if off. There will be times when it will occur to you that you are unable to cry anymore and the tears won't come out. And then there will be times when you will be lending the fresh jingoists your shoulder to cry on because yours has become strong enough to sustain their weight, and you'll be telling them "This too shall pass."

These will be few of the symptoms through which you will know you have become a Pakistani cricket masochist and have converted into a specie so unique that the world gets fascinated by you and finds pacification of sorts by watching you. You will be the embodiment of Rudyard Kipling's If..

Welcome to the holy cult, chosen ones. Welcome to the greener side.

Abhi ishq ke imtihaan aur bhi hain.. (More tests of your love await you..)

Prescribed Ettiquettes and Attitudes for TGME (The Greatest Match Ever)

# 1: Please don't make tiresome bullshit political analogies. Lazy bloggers, opportunistic Aman Ki Asha-ists and op-ed writers, we are looking at you. It takes the gist away from this mighty cricket match.

#2: This match will NOT defeat terrorism, nor it will root out any extremists on either side of the border. Also, keep away any lunatic thoughts of intelligence agencies cashing on it as a strategic asset.

#3: This match is not about fucking peace or Kashmir or Hindus or Muslims. Its the most important game, this sport ever conceived. Take it in that vein.

#4: Dear fair weather fans, welcome to your brief stay in our cauldron of madness. Please stop making references to the 2000 World Cup and other things that never happened, and we promise not to kill you during the first drinks break.

#5: Loser desi footie fans, if you're going to compare this to ManU v Liverpool, El Classico or some shit, please piss off right now, you won't be spared.

#6: Cricket will NOT be the winner. Stop even thinking of fucking saying anything related to that notion without the NOT in that statement. It really does tick us off.

#7: To all those who are bemoaning how cricket obfuscates the region's real problems and this how match will be the proof, we are sorry your mommy never loved you..

#8: If you read about complaints of cyber orgasms, squirting, constipation, illnesses et al. on social networks in the remaining hours leading up to the match starts, don't fucking complain. Live with it.

#9: For all those who are terming this as the cricket's holiest war, End of Times, Judgement Day et al. we fucking love you. It is going to be just that, in that Colosseum.

#10: For Indian and Pakistani expats and homegrown fans now living abroad, we empathize with you the most. It's genuinely tough being a hypocrite on face to each other while watching a Pak-Ind match together, so let's stay like that not bring each other women in verbal ways discreetly.

#11: A cricket match was never won through Facebook polls and never will be. Especially, when it is the Grand Daddy of 'em all on Wednesday. So, take our advice and avoid these kinky heroics.

- This post was co-authored by Ahmer Naqvi who blogs at Karachi Khatmal. It was first published here at Clear Cricket.

Best of 2010 - The year that was

I know its a bit dilatory to come up with something related to 2010 with the first week of new year already done but I guess I had to. Call it a formality or an urge to talk on it, I've picked 10 individual performances which stood out to me, along with couple of special ones which I watched live from the stands. England may have been the best team in all formats overall and India touching new heights in test cricket, but there is an arguable case of this year being one which had some of the most memorable individual spectacles witnessed in the current era of the game.

Personally speaking, it was a massive year in which I followed the game like a nutcase; probably the grand English summer had to do with it and attending games of England-Australia and then the ones having Pakistan with the two. Pardon me if I miss out any of your favorite ones in the following selection and I know there have been quite a few I have, but I focused more on the ones which had resounding impacts on the specific match and more imperatively, a follower's memory. Please note I haven't put these in any specific ranking, just tried prioritizing them on certain basis (with me being Pakistani, one; a self-confessed Indian cricket fan, two; and the rest of the lousy cricket world, being the third).

The beast of the year

VVS Laxman, 73* - Mohali, October 2010

There are steel nerves and then there are nerves of VVS Laxman.

Punter: Dang mate, this VVS chap slices my balls every time

India were 124/8, chasing 216 on a 4th innings disoriented track against an Australian team hellbent on proving points, he played one of the best ever test innings one could witness under pressure - Methodological, temperamental and artistic. And all this with a troubled back, with a runner in most of his innings. 73 may not sound much on a casual read but the monumental impact it had was only possible if you were watching it live, and rightfully he has been praised for this gem. Also proved why he has been a more major Aussie nemesis than any other contemporary cricketer.

Over the course of the year, he played 3 more humongous knocks- 103* against Sri Lanka at P Sara Columbo which enabled India to level the series, 91 versus New Zealand at Ahmedabad when India were in tatters at 15/5 in their 2nd innings and facing an unexpected knock out, and a truly masterful performance at Durban vs South Africa which enabled India to level a test series for the very first time in South Africa. Some people may rate his 103* versus SL as his better effort than the one against Australia, but as go personal picks and watching, the latter does it for me. He surely is one of my favorite cricketers and is probably one of the most unsung heroes of world cricket at present. Take a bow, Very Very Special Laxman.

Impossible is nothing

Abdul Razzaq, 109* off 72 - Abu Dhabi, 31 October 2010

There are days when you watch cricket and know some things are theoretically impossible to achieve. And then you realize there are monsters like Abdul Razzaq who make that inconceivable a joke. Much has been said about this one innings, from it being an unimaginable orgy of power hitting to an outrageous game stealer and what not. Every word is true and every accolade deserving of more overwhelming connotations. He played as if he didn't have a pulse and gave you the feel that he was sleepwalking this, and you wouldn't have known it would end up being one of the greatesr innings while chasing a formidable target. It easily goes down as the ODI innings of the year and one of the best in memory of any cricket follower. Furthermore, it also stamped his authority as being one of the very best finishers in limited overs formats, with the stats and viewing over 13+ years being valid proofs.

31st October 2010 was the day Razzler became a cricket god.

The fast bowling orgasm of the season

Mohammad Aamir, 6-84 - Lord's, August 2010

The overwhelming beauty and the holy essence of this spell still is encrypted in the minds of those who were blown away by this kid. The surreal state it left all who witnessed it live is not possible to jot down in mere words. He played god with the cherry that morning, shaping it like a banana both ways and acting as an artist painting a masterpiece in one-go. In space of 8 deliveries, he sliced the English top order in a manner rarely seen in modern cricket. The events that folded afterwards overshadowed his magic, yet this is a memory that will be cherished forever.

The daddy of WTFs

Michael Hussey, 134* - Sydney, January 2010

Imma gonna snatch the candy from yo mama!

You will follow this sports all your life and even your best bets could vary, and you wouldn't witness such a stunning performance being pulled off once every second day. It was a one-man show of the grandest artistry and courage, aided by the appalling Yousuf & co and a defiant tail. From a dead-and-buried position he mastered Australia to a formidable score, which proved too much for the shattered opposition.

Suffice to say, he was most influential in inflicting one of the most forgettable test match defeats to Pakistan and the day itself went down as an apocalyptic one in Pakistan's history.

The Ultimate ODI innings

Sachin Tendulkar, 200* off 147 - 24 February 2010, Gwalior

You know this was scripted somewhere in the heavens. The man who holds almost every batting record in the game had to do this and he did it with some style. Words would fail here but it should suffice to say it was the batting god at his divine best. He played only 2 ODIs in the year and to think he accomplished this humongous feat in one of them is no less than mind-numbing.

Gladiatorial

Shahid Afridi, 109 off 76 - Colombo, 15 June 2010

There are very few individual performances in cricket which can be separated strikingly from those of the rest playing the very same match. Add to it, the intense humidity of a Colombo summer evening, limping and dehydrated actor, and you may picture this phenomenal Afridi-ish innings. It was evident he was on an entirely different plain, with the rest of his teammates falling like ninepins on the other. In one specific delivery of Muralitharan the whole innings was summed up, when he danced down the track and lifted him over the sight screen and then fell flat on the pitch grimacing with pain due to cramps and backache. He couldn't finish the game off, yet this very knock has to go down as one of the best he ever played.

Classic robbery in broad daylight

Michael Hussey, 60* off 24 - St. Lucia, 1 May 2010 (Semi final, World Cup T20)

It was Sydney 2010 all over again - same teams and the same candy snatcher. It was an absconding and heart shattering show. In matter of few minutes, he mercilessly stole smiles from millions of delirious and frantic souls of one part of the world only to gift them to his countrymen. Even by T20's freakiest barometer, this stunner was off it. Even a richter scale would have found it tough to measure its impact.

This damned streak will forever haunt and resonate in the minds of any Pakistani cricket follower - 4, 0, 6, 6, 4, 6.. Game over. It was book cricket scoring. Period.

McScoops service for the fastest T20 hundred

Brendon McCullum, 116* off 56 - Christchurch, 28 February 2010

This was the innings and the day by the end of which the cricket world would have said it has seen it all when there is talk about inventive shot-making. It sure felt like that. This innings can only be gauged by the mesmerizing and carnage McCullum wreaked, constantly paddle sweeping Tait at 150+ kph, scooping Nannes on one knee, slog sweeping almost all the Aussie attack into the stands; and last but not the least, kept unleashing an orthodox power hitting avalanche with constant ease and brutality. It got its due share when it won the ICC T20 performance of the year award (well almost: Attention mr. Hussey).

Comeback of the year

Younis Khan, 131* - Dubai, November 2010

Take that, bitches - A personal favorite, the man and the innings.

He was returning to the test arena after 16 months, amidst the moronic circus of Pakistan cricket and with all the traumas that  had engulfed him, and ended up doing a masterclass against arguably the best bowling attack in the world. It was an impeccable knock, contained with assurance and class that he embodies, and it enabled Pakistan to draw the test match. This small matter of a quality hundred cemented the fact of him being one of the best 4th innings players in the game's history. It was the return of Younis Khan and it was as resounding as it could be.

The Fuck-You performance

Mitchell Johnson, 9-82 & 62 - Perth, December 2010

A vintage rebuttal by the cricketer whose performances are classified as one of the most polarized in the game. Being ridiculed, bashed and clattered both, on-field and off-field, and then dropped for the previous test match, Mitch did a comeback display of titanic proportions. He blew England away at the most critical juncture of the series, first with a crucial late order half century and then producing one of the best fast bowling spells of the year post-lunch which was filled with breathtaking moments.

The best I saw live

Moggie, the finisher

Eoin Morgan, 103* off 85 balls -22 June 2010, Southampton

Being there witnessing it was an absolute pleasure. Those reverse sweeps are still afresh in the memory, and every bit of this innings is a bliss to behold. The mastery he demonstrated with the exemplary serenity and repose was a treat to watch, toying with the Aussie attack with ultimate ease. If Morgan was not recognized as a serious force in limited overs versions till then, and especially as a finisher, this high quality knock surfaced him in one of the best possible manners. From 97-4 to finishing it off with plenty of deliveries to spare, he was unstoppable.

The ultimate ODI spell

Umar Gul, 6-42 - The Brit Oval, 17 September 2010

Pakistan was 0-2 down in the 5 game series and was cornered from all angles, both on-field and off-field. It was defending a modest ODI score of 241 and England were cruising at 201-5. Enters Umar Gul for his second spell. England lose their next 4 wickets for 3 runs in 3 overs of him, with him eventually ending up with a career best of 6-42. It was a sheer sensational display of fast bowling under lights. In both his spells he made the ball talk and sparked a turnaround of momentous proportions. What made it extra special was watching it live from the stands amidst massive tension and constant rounds between the Pakistani and English supporters (the spot fixing saga didn't help wee bit), and the scenario of Pakistan being nowhere in the series till then. It was Gull-dozing at its ultimate best.

- This post was first published here at Clear Cricket.

- McCullum's innings added after @Mykuhl input on it and my memory lapse/cricket overdose.

For Everything, There is Younis Khan

If you had the chance to pick only one gladiator to battle for you in the bull ring, you will have to pick him. If you had to name only one assassin to do the job for you and that too with a smile, you will pay for him. If you had to seek an epitome of fighting dignity for yourself and your countrymen, you will analyze only his persona. If you had to teach sportsmanship to kids of a game called cricket and its tormented gentleman's essence, you will request him to do it. Because, for everything there is Younis Khan.

His legacy

He may not be the classic copy-book batsman out there nor the most explosive of the belligerent hitters in the game, yet there is something uncanny about him that makes him a must in the present day cricket. Probably, its the aura of calmness he oozes in nerve-wrecking scenarios and the warm feel that you get from watching him do his thing as if you are being given vicks vapors. Probably, its the controlled passion he displays with a pint of bravado in his glass that he has to offer to you. Probably, its the fire he possesses in his belly, being the Pathan he is, which amazingly does not go untrammeled even in the grandest of hippodromes.

All his cricketing credentials aside, the man carries a million dollar smile which he entertains amidst every trauma he goes through and no matter how life pushes him to the corner. Be it a personal tragedy of losing his father in middle of a tour or the death of Bob Woolmer, who he deemed as his father figure and who used to call Younis his third son, that smile hardly broke; and even when he had been left all alone by his own team mates who conspired against him and when his own countrymen started labeling him as a confused individual just because he always wore his heart on his sleeve, the smile was still there. Though he did accept in middle of the mayhem happening with and around him that he had to stop smiling yet it was always visible, even if it was a bit subdued.



You can bet all your money on this that if it had been someone else but Younis Khan, all his principles and  decorum would have fallen off and accepted defeat, compromised to bowing in front of his nincompoop masters and gotten back in the arena but not him. All through his vigil of observing his plotters get back, he remained steady as a hawk and kept that chin up, and ultimately got back to do what he does best. For he is the man  possessed, he is the one for the moment.

A modern day great?

Pundits will tell you his cricketing achievements have been understated, since his records and stats give enough evidence that he deserves to be enumerated as one of the  current giants of the game. Take any format of the game and he is up there with the bests, be it in the stats or as a leader. Here, we try dissecting his career and ascertain his significance in the game.

Most definitely his greatest feat in cricket career would remain captaining Pakistan to the T20 World Cup win in England in the summer of 2009 when his boys roared as the famous cornered tigers. A triumph that had a stark similarity to the country's other successful global prize campaign, the World Cup win of 1992, and one in which he gave the world the most famous quote of that format when he termed it as fun and associated it with WWE. At that lifetime conjuncture, he decided to give up his boots in that format so that new blood could be inducted. This was to be the threshold of his greatness which has always been coupled with absolute humility.

Statistical study of his career

10 years is a good enough period to scrutinize a cricketer's career and his standing in the game. Younis Khan, to-date, has played 64 test matches, 207 One Day Internationals and 22 T20s. He has captained his national team in all three formats and won a world title in the T20 format from which he has gracefully retired.

Test Match Genius

We look into his test match credentials and try to figure why he should be acknowledged as a modern day champion in the most important version of the game.

•  He is one of the top 10 current batsmen in the game who average 50 plus in test matches, and has an equally good home and away record.

• He is only one of the 4 current players in the game with a triple century to boost against his name.

• In test matches that Pakistan has won and drawn (39/64), he averages a whooping 66.12 with 13 of his 17 centuries coming in them. And that average increases to 68 in test matches that Pakistan has won.

• In his last 31 matches, he has averaged an amazing 65.47 with 11 centuries.

• And here is the most significant stat as go his test match credentials. He is the modern day best when it matters the most, technically and impact-wise, in the 5 day contest; when it has counted the most, he has graced the occasion with his quality and brilliance.

He has a stunning average of 62.0 in the 4th innings, which places him in the top 5 of all-time, with only Michael Hussey accompanying him in the top 10. That list has the present day giants such as Sachin Tendulkar at no. 52 (average of 38.77), Rahul Dravid at no. 35 (average of 42.78) and Mohammad Yousuf at no. 34 (average 43.00). Only Ricky Ponting and Graeme Smith average above 50 out of the current players.

In the same statistical analysis, he also has the most number of hundreds, i.e. 4 (matched by Ponting and Sarwan). Out of those 4 hundreds, 3 have resulted in saving the match for Pakistan, and what better than the latest titanic effort of his against the Proteas.

• Now let's look at his numbers against the top 5 ranked teams in the world.

He averages 88.06 against India which places him 3rd in the game's history with players scoring 1000 or above runs against them. Also, is no. 2 in all-time list of scoring maximum runs in a test match versus India.

Against South Africa his average is 52.57, versus Sri Lanka its 51.24, against England its 45.46 and its 31.83 against Australia. So barring Oz against whom he's played only 6 tests (the lowest among his matches against these top 5), his stats are world class and comparable to any modern great.

A serious force in ODI business

As goes his playing style, he is one of the rare conventional batsmen in the modern game. For most of them, ODIs may not be the specialization anymore but for him its a challenge he takes up and is  as good as anyone when the chips are down and you need someone to lead you from the front.

• While chasing and Pakistan winning, he averages a brilliant 43.75. When Pakistan has won batting first, he averages 39.06. Both stats are a mile away from his career average of 32.48, and clearly show he is a  major influence whenever Pakistan wins ODIs.

• All his 6 ODI hundreds have been matchwinners and include 3 modern one day cricket masterclasses while chasing, 2 against India (Mohali & Karachi) and one against England.

• When he has not compiled a century while chasing, he has come up with gems in low scoring games and been the man of the Match, such as the one against Australia in Melbourne (Docklands), June 2002 and India in Abu Dhabi, April 2006. Then, his recent fabulous effort versus South Africa is a clear vindication of him being one of the best chasers in the game.

The Comeback King

If you have followed him in his career to any considerable extent, you would know he deserves this accolade as much as anyone else out there in the game. Here we look at 2 of the most memorable Younis Khan moments.

• Kitply Cup in Bangladesh (2008) - He had bagged consecutive ducks in the league games against India and Bangladesh and was under immense pressure either to perform or to give away his place, he came up with the goods in the big game, the final versus India, and was deservedly the MOTM.

• 1st Test match vs South Africa, Dubai 2010 - Being kept out of the test team for the last 16 months by the lunatic Ijaz Butt and putting up against the shoddy politics engulfing him, Younis showed the world what it was missing. A herculean 4th innings hundred against arguably the best test bowling attack of the world enabling Pakistan a draw against all odds. In context of the state of Pakistan cricket and his own personal traumatic experiences, it was surely the return of the king.

Cometh the hour, Cometh the man

Mohammad Younis Khan may not end up as your lifetime hero nor your stereotypical great cricketer but trust him to be your savior when you will turn your back to everyone you counted on because they just could not handle the pressure of the coliseum and wilted away. He will be the braveheart who is going to never compromise on his values and will put a fight for your freedom and your country at any price. He will remain the juggler amongst the clowns in the circus of world cricket. He will still be the working-class man who goes home every night smiling happily with his day's work no matter what paltry wage he gets. He will be your punchbag absorbing your frustrations when you need to vent them out. He will be whatever you will crave for, because for everything, there is Younis Khan.

He will forever be the last man standing!

Younis Khan zindabad!

- This post was first published here at Clear Cricket.

The Great Debates - Wasim Akram vs Waqar Younis

As the name goes, these are supposed to be few attempts in which we will dare to profess two parallel greats of specific eras and try to contemplate on their sheer greatness and ultimately, make an immortal attempt to compare them. It must be foretold that these attempts may be flawed and not satisfy every follower of the game who was/is enthralled by those greats.

In this first study, we pick two of the greatest fast bowlers the game of cricket was ever graced with. They were a duo for whom every accolade that is humanly possible has been put forward, before whom even their greatest critics and conspirators had to bow and the legacies and aura of whom still make up the game played today. Words fall short in all honesty to define their greatness, hence we'll simply start this off. Its a humble take on the Ws, Wasim Akram and Waqar Younis.

What basically started as a random twitter chat on one fine October night about the two W's by me, Sana Kazmi and Faran Ghumman ultimately transformed into some factual and statistical debate. Sana Kazmi casually quoted Imran Khan, the godfather of Pakistan cricket, who termed Wasim as the one who gave up too soon out of the two Ws, and then what followed is the basis of this venture, and which was then further discussed through e-mails and also a respected input from Subash Jayaraman. And with me being a self-proclaimed greatest fan of Wasim bhai, this was bound to be a bit interesting.

Back to the theme, let me clarify that to aptly analyse the greatness of the two Ws is next-to-impossible as every proper cricket follower would know; hence, this debate consists of only specific points and considerations. Also, we are only analysing the test match careers of them here, and if ODIs were to be done too then whatever follows here wouldn't ever be able to be jotted down too.

Since the main talk revolved around the 'effectiveness' of the two, there were some arguments given. which were countered. In the following, I have quoted and summarized the emails and various points in consideration to the best of my abilities. 

I. In Pakistan & Subcontinent

My point of Wasim's career Strike-Rate (SR) being less than Waqar's owed to the fact that he bowled more in the flat subcontinents pitches than Waqar, hence his SR was bound to be affected more. Sana takes my point and hits back with the following:

Percentage of overs in Pakistan
Waqar 1046.4 out of 2704 -> 38.6%
Wasim 1312 out of 3771 -> 34.8%
So Wasim bowled only 4% more of his overs in Pakistan than Waqar did, which you would have to agree, is too small difference to account for a difference in their overall strike-rates of more than 10 (Waqar's 43.4 vs. Wasim's 54.6). Even if you don't agree with that, your argument is basically that Wasim has worse stats because he bowled on pitches less suited to fast bowling - in which case you must extend the analysis to the entire sub-continent, not just Pakistan. 

Percentage of overs bowled in the sub-continent (Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Bangladesh, India, UAE*)
Waqar 1370/2704 -> 50.6%
Wasim 1887.2/3771.1 -> 50 %

When you compare the percentage of their overs bowled throughout the sub-continent, it's the same! (In fact, if I was being anal, I'd say Waqar actually bowled .6% more of his overs on flat pitches.

Though I'll admit that the kind of bowler Wasim was made him less suited to dead tracks than Waqar with his extreme pace, I don't really believe in comparing bowlers on where they've bowled if they're from the same team. Unless there's a huge difference in the no. of overs, it evens out more or less. (Of course in Wasim and Waqar's case I would say it did in their case, it evened out completely, but that's unusual).

*Wasim never played a Test in the UAE

My take:

As I said, Waqar bettered Wasim in subcontinent mainly because they played most of the games vs Ind, SL, WI, NZ, Zim (with which we won almost very series,a nd they weren't the best of teams, lets be honest).
And they played hardly any v Aus and SA (which were unarguably the best teams of that era- late 80s and whole of 90s). Lets see some stats in this regard.

First, take Waqar in Pakistan.
Team   Matches   Wkts
NZ         5              35
SL         8              31
Zim        7              41
WI         5              24

Total      25            131
Waqar played 33 matches in Pak. Hence, 25/33 is a large proportion!

Now, Wasim in Pakistan.
Team   Matches   Wkts
NZ         2              10
SL         10             28
Zim        6               28
WI         8               43  

Total      26            109
Wasim played 41 of his 104 matches in Pak.

So, we can see Waqar has more wickets, better average and SR against these low ranked teams of that era. Which ultimately helped him getting a better avg and SR at home & subcontinent than Wasim.

Wasim v Aus+SA took 21 wkts in 6 games.
Waqar v Aus+SA took 14 wkts in 4 games.

So this shows they were almost equal against the top 2 teams of their era, sadly they played too less at home to properly analyse who was better against the top teams.

II. Against the best team (Aus) of their era.

My next point is on who was better in the country that mattered the most. Yes, in Australia and vs Australia too.
 

And Wasim wins it comfortably, in all depts- wickets, average and SR.

v Aus           Matches     Wickets   Average    SR  

Wasim           13             50           25.7          59.8  
Waqar           12             30           33.8          62.7

in Aus
Wasim            9               36          24.0           58.0    
Waqar            7               14          40.5           81.4  

So, in Aus and v Aus, Wasim was the daddy.

III. Against the top teams of their era.

Another major point, which should give a fair idea of who was better overall wkts/match and avg wise v the other top teams in their era. I'm taking SA, Eng, Ind and WI (WI because they were tough till 97', at least)

First, Waqar.
Team            Matches        Wickets    Average    SR      Wkts/match
SA                  7                    23           28.7      50.6         3.2
Eng                11                   50           27.0      48.5         4.5
Ind                  4                     8            47.0      80.2         2
WI                 13                   55           23.3      36.6         4.2

Now, Wasim.
Team            Matches        Wickets    Average    SR      Wkts/match
SA                   4                  13            29.7      65.0          3.2
Eng                18                   57           30.6      69.8          3.2
Ind                 12                   45           29.8      65.0          3.75
WI                 17                   79           20.8      44.9          4.6

Against NZ and SL, both were equally good (almost inseparable stats-wise).

By above stats, we see:
Wasim bettering Waqar in Wkts/Match by 2-1.
Waqar bettering Wasim in SR by 3-1 while Avg-wise, both are 2-2.

So, its basically evens stevens in those stars. Saying any one of them was better than the other would be stupid, so I would like you all to focus on the first 2 points that I detailed, esp, v Aus and in Aus. 

IV. Longevity 

Subash pointed out that "You need to have longevity to get in to any sort of All time XI. In terms of SR and Average, there isn't much to choose between the two, in which case, you have to go with overall skill set and longevity and hence, I go with Wasim."

When looking at the two W's in matches that Pakistan won:

Wasim played 104 tests; Won: 41

Total wkts 414; In matches won: 211 at 18.48 average.

Waqar played 87 tests; Won: 39.

Total wkts 373; In matches won: 222 at 18.20 average.

By this stat, Waqar could be termed slighty more "effective" but Wasim had longevity.

V. The eight-year period (1990-1997) & few other astounding stats.

This cricinfo stats analysis by S Rajesh tells a lot about the two W's, their dominance in the cricket world, Wasim edging Waqar in few areas and more. There is hardly any difference in Wasim and Waqar as go the performance during those 8 years (Wasim has the better avg and Waqar has the better SR), yet no one in the game was better than them, and here we are talking about an era of the game which saw the likes of McGrath, Warne, Donald, Ambrose etc.

The most vital factor I want to press here is the MOTM (Man of the match) frequency Wasim had. During these eight years, Akram was Man of the Match in 12 of the 48 Tests he played, an incredible average of one every four games. And even in his whole career, his frequency 17 MOTM out of 104 matches is the best in the game's history. So, if there was any question of being 'effective' and to influence the matches, I don't think there can be any more comprehensive argument than this.

Conclusion? Honestly, Impossible.

Having discussed all this, even though I've tried my best to put more weight in Wasim bhai's half, I'm of the opinion that it will forever remain an impossible task to edge one of them over the other in most of the areas/aspects. Individually, they were an entire world within themselves. Sheer masters of new and old ball, absolute gods of swing and a lifetime phenomenon to witness.

Subash has a liking for Wasim bhai and fittingly says, "Also, I think a lot of the times people some times get influenced by the ODI performances in their overall judgement of the players. Of course, Wasim was a stud and leading wicket taker there as well, but the brutality and devastation of Waqar's inswinging yorkers could swing some arguments.

As long as we keep those two separate -- i don't think its as close as the stats seem to indicate. Wasim was born to bowl. So raw when he came on, but quickly became the stud that he was for the longest time.

P.S. To this day, I remember watching the 92 finals on a grainy screen at a friend's house. I was 15 then. Old enough to understand the game and the players playing it. Still cannot comprehend how he turned the game on its head with those 3 balls."

Sana puts in one her emails: "Wasim obviously had more variety, and hence - you would think - more skill, and was just... special. Without needing to be express. And it's incredible that he was diagnosed with diabetes at 26 and still looked like he was at his peak till 31 or so. Plus two very different kind of bowlers, so not really fair to compare. And, like I was telling, I think this whole exercise of picking an all-time XI is really dumb. (Gideon Haigh wrote a great article on Cricinfo on why it's futile to do so). "

My drift is understandably towards Wasim Akram, for various other reasons; the one which should suffice here would that he has been my boyhood inspiration and forever will remain. Watching him was like seeing a god turn his left arm over, do the divine and then celebrate. Having said that, make no bones crack, I would die a dozen times if I was told I would be able to see Waqar Younis in his pomp live again. There were and will be hardly any better sights in the game then a Waqar's toe-crushing yorker. For Waqar's fans and all those interested in this read, here is a really scintillating piece by Alex Bowden (click the weblink).

All said, I believe we haven't and won't ever be able to do justice with such comparisons or analysis, because some legends and there comparisons in cricket are incomprehensible. To do any justice, here we go with a mini-reminder of what these two of the proudest sons of Pakistan were like:

Any comments and views on this and any personal takes would be appreciated. Much thanks.